My friend Armando is given to flights of fancy. “Think about it, Tops,” he would say, for instance. “What if I looked like Piolo?” I don’t bother to, of course, not even for argument’s sake — Piolo Pascual has problems enough just being himself. Besides, Armand’s girlfriend can’t be that lucky, never mind that she’s one of my dearest friends.
Then the Miss Universe TV teaser comes on. “Aguuuy,” he goes. “Imagine having Miss Universe as my girlfriend.”
Now I know what to say to that. “You’d be the butt of jokes all across the planet.”
“You’re being mean.”
“Am I? Look at your beer belly, for crying out loud.”
Oh, everything is possible, I guess; it’s only a matter of imagination. Just let that imagination be mine — it’s better if I fill in the blanks myself. Take that cake pictured above: believe it or not, it goes with the pompous-sounding appellation of “World’s Best Cake” (I used this recipe). That already makes me wary right there, because if you have to say it, well, you know. And the darndest thing is that it ain’t bad at at all. Far from it — I would even say it’s good (Ma agrees, BTW). It’s the presumption that gets to me.
As I post this, Miss Philippines has just been crowned Miss Universe — and in rather dramatic (as in telenovela) fashion, I couldn’t help but suspect the “oversight” was orchestrated rather than accidental. There is imagination enough for everyone. Let the speculations fly.
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