Have some heart

It is with embarrassment that I admit that, until an hour ago, I had no idea the banana heart was actually a flower. A bud, to be exact. Frankly, I had never given it much thought until I sat down to write this post.

I also have to confess that my newly acquired knowledge has only led to more confusion. Let’s see… The banana is an herb which develops fruits from female flowers. And then there’s the heart-shaped protuberance at the tip of the stem, that purple bud, which, when served as a viand is considered… hold on — a vegetable?! It’s stuff like this that drives me bananas, no pun intended.

But enough about my neuroses. I have always loved banana heart/blossom/bud salad. Interestingly, all the banana brings to the dish are texture and a soft crunch. It’s bland on its own, although when mixed with spices and coconut cream, it acquires a distinct subtlety that’s pleasing to both eye and palate.

To be honest, though: I didn’t make that salad. Coconut cream-based salads I leave to others to prepare, not because they’re simple enough for any idiot to make, but because on my first crack at making one, I was totally humbled. Oh, I did right by the spices (finely sliced ginger, red onion, and shallots). It was the coconut cream that did me in. I had no idea you were supposed to use vinegar — not water — to extract it.

Not that nobody tried to set me straight. The cook managed to get a “But —” out of her mouth before I cut her off. I did, however, entertain a nagging suspicion that all was not well when I saw how watery the dish was. Alas, my grandmother didn’t raise no culinary fool. Ma had a forkful of that salad, promptly stood up running, and flung herself out the window — all the while bemoaning how she had spawned a first-class cretin for an only son. It was a bitch washing the blood off the pavement afterward.

But you know I jest. Nothing of that sort happened. After I told her about the water, Ma raised a brow and declared that I had the brain of a fish fry. I hope you’ll be more forgiving.